I try to be friendly with everyone. I’m that person at work. I will help you, answer questions, guide you. I will do whatever I can to help you be better at your job. That being said, even if I don’t like you, I will still try to be polite, social, friendly, and civil towards you.
But, this cat has pushed me to the edge.
I start everyone on a clean slate. Even if I hear things about them from others, that’s not my experience. I want to give people a chance to show me who and how they are.
Right of the bat, mansplainer showed his colors. We have a chat for our team. We use it to share messages about our callers, clients, ask questions, and tell jokes and share stories. Yes, we do share stories about our callers. Because sometimes we need to. But that’s a blog for a different day.
It didn’t take me long to see mansplainer had a knack for starting things. Even to the point of just to start an argument. He even has admitted to doing this because he “was bored.” Who does That?”
Having dealt with my own narcissistic partner, I had seen this behavior before. So, immediately my alarms are blaring. Red flags flying. But, I’m not listening. I’m shoving that all down. “Not everyone is the same as him. It’ll be ok. You’re overreacting.” So, I chose, and still choose, to not engage in the baiting. And, it’s worked. So far.
Moving forward, some ladies and I were talking about being positive and creating better energy. I have a new water bottle that has positive things on it. I was talking about how I read those things as I fill the water bottle and then hold the bottle and read those things again. As a witch, this is a thing I do. I’m infusing the water with positive intentions and energy so when I drink the water I absorb that energy as well.
So, mansplainer here’s me and says, “Wow, that’s such a placebo. ” Now, he didn’t just say it. It over exaggerated it in such a condescending tone, I legitimately wanted to throw the bottle at his head. I asked if the placebo actually works, is it still a fake cure or magic. This chucklehead proceeded to tell me magic doesn’t exist. I’m like, hi, this actually my faith base. This is my belief system. This is my religion. And he told me witches and magic aren’t real.
Y’all. I’m a fake person. I’m not real. I don’t exist. Are you friggin kidding me? Thank the goddess I had a call come in to keep me from coming unglued and possibly losing my job.
Moving on, yesterday was the end all be all of mansplainer and his attitude. A young lady on my team mentioned she needed a massage. Cue the mansplainer. He proceeds to tell her she doesn’t need a massage. No one needs a massage. She just needs to stretch and do it properly.
I’m a trained massage therapist. And this douche canoe is straight telling this woman what she needs and doesn’t need. Like, no, dude. You don’t get to tell someone what she wants or needs. If a woman says she needs a massage, then she needs a massage. That’s it.
Oh, but it wasn’t. Because he proceeded to ramble on about how massage cost too much and “if you wanna waste $50 That’s on you.” I’m like, hi. I spent 30k going to school. Supplies were sometimes 300 plus a month. On top of continuing education units. I had to learn anatomy, physiology, pathology, and kinesiology. And I was the top of my class. I was damn good at what I did. I could have easily charged 60 plus for an hour. I charged 20 because of the community I served. And this Google research expert thought he knew more about how massage works than I do. Again I say, are you friggin kidding me?
But the end all be all came with an interaction between another lady on my team and him. A new team member was locked out of his phone. Mansplainer asked if anyone knew what to do. A lady on my team stated to hit the forgot password button and Put in the work email and click the link. Mansplainer straight up stood there and said, “Oh that’s cute, yeah no that doesn’t work.”
Hold up. Nope. Wrong answer. Ms. D was not about that. She let him know in no uncertain terms that it does work, she just did it the other day and not to ever speak to her in those words or tone ever again. Ms. D has been at this job almost a full year. Mansplainer only 2 months on the floor.
Ms. D is part of the original 6 members of our campaign. She knows the system and how it works because she was a guinea pig for the system. The reason it works now is because of her and a few others on our team. They learned the work around and the fixes for when the system doesn’t quite do what it should.
I’m at a crossroads here. I want to stand up and scream at this guy. I want to cut him down to size and make him feel as small and insignificant as he tries to make others feel. And I also want to be mature and just ignore him. In the end, I really don’t know how I’ll react. But I do hope that one day he finds out how it feels to be treated so shamefully. I hope the full horrors of his actions and behaviors are revealed to him.
And that right there is a bit of magic he should hope never works.