The Glorious Train Wreck Mom

This is a safe space for all train wrecks. Except here, we don't give you a puppy and a latte. We give you sarcasm and humor.

Welcome aboard, train wreck.

It’s that time of year when I tap into my inner serial killer and take out my rage on innocent pumpkins. Not gonna lie. There is something oddly therapeutic about hacking, slashing, and scooping a pumpkin. I also totally OD on pumpkin seeds. Might be my seasonal depression kicking in and stocking up on the magnesium. Either way, win win.

If this is your first time here, welcome aboard, train wreck. Glad to have you here. If this isn’t your first time here, I’m still glad to have you. Please like, comment, share, and subscribe. My goal is to have five hundred subscribers by the end of the year. I think we can make that happen. Please consider donating to help keep this going. $1 and I’ll ask you what your favorite book is so we can talk about it. $5 and I’ll write a review of a book you suggest. $10 and I’ll write a blog suggested by you. As always, I will link the books and where you can buy them. When you use my links to buy, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. This helps me buy more books to read and review. And coffee and wine for the rest of my time that isn’t reading. So, thank you.

My husband has been on a Lord of the Rings kick so why wouldn’t I pick the creepiest character to turn into a jack o lantern.

If you don’t know Gollum was a river Hobbit. He found the ring, killed his cousin, and ran off in hiding. The ring possessed him and turned him into a hollow shell of a piteous creature. His brain split in half. Gollum is more obsessed with that ring than a Paparazzi hun.

You can buy the series here.

So, in order to do this, I needed to gather supplies. And by gather I mean look in the junk drawer for what we had left over from last year. I found the template online. All I did was Google it. You should be able to find it, too.

One pumpkin to rule them all.

Once I cut top off (I cut on an angle so the top doesn’t fall in) I start scooping and scraping.

I put the seeds and guts in a bowl of water. This helps separate everything.

While those are soaking, I get to work on the carving itself. I cut the corners so it would wrap around the pumpkin better. If you can find a flat faced pumpkin, carving goes way easier. Once I had it in place, I taped it down and got to poking. I found a poking tool we used last year. This helps you create the outline so you can cut later. This took forever and my hands hurt so bad. I think next time I need to scrape the inside down a little more. Having it a little thinner might make it easier and less tediously painful.

This is where I stepped out and my husband stepped in. With a Dremel. This was legit the best idea ever. Way better precision than with my hack and slash knife. Again, this part took about an hour and I’m thinking if the walls of the pumpkin were a little thinner it may have been easier.

He started with the bigger sections and worked to the finer details.

My Precious.

Well, that’s the creepiest thing I could have looking at me.

Now, you may be asking about those pumpkin seeds. Once you have them separated from the pulp, single layer them on a cookie sheet. Drizzle with a little olive oil and a generous helping of salt. 200 degrees for 30 minutes. Stir them around about halfway through to get them all good and toasty.

If you’ve done a bookish jack o lantern, or just a cool pumpkin in general, I’d love to see. Comment or share. Again, if you like what I post, please like, comment, share, and subscribe. Please consider donating to help keep this going. $1 and I’ll ask you what your favorite book is so we can talk about it. $5 and I’ll write a review of a book you suggest. $10 and I’ll write a blog suggested by you. If you read any of the books listed, please let me know what you thought of it. That’s all I’ve got for today, train wrecks. All aboard.

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If you need an easy way to carve your pumpkins, I recommend this set.

About this item

  • PUMPKIN CARVING KIT FOR KIDS: Halloween pumpkin carving kit with stencils for all ages.
  • SAFE FOR KIDS: Our pumpkin decorating kit with pumpkin stencils is safe for kids. NO knives needed!
  • SATISFACTION GUARANTEED: Our pumpkin carving tools are backed by our Manufacturer Quality Guarantee.
  • EASY CLEANUP: Simply drop our pumpkin stencils for carving in the dishwasher for easy clean up.
  • WORKS: Pumpkin carving set and pumpkin gutter is as effective as a professional pumpkin carving kit.

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